Why does it always seem that when things are going a wry “Mercury is Retrograding,” sound familiar? Then keep reading…
Wow, what a ride! Looking back at the waters reflection I can see the sun shining through the broken wave. The wave has now expanded itself as it is reunited back with the whole body of life that is the ocean. Perhaps metaphorically I am like a surfer riding a wave and perhaps I’m even a wave because there is no doubt about it, I am a part of the whole.
Things were feeling a bit disconnected in my world lately, some people say that’s normal when Mercury is in retrograde… Well can’t Mercury just be a great sport and stop creating tension in my life? Better yet, how about I assume responsibility for my own feelings, emotions, causes and effects in my life to have a better grip on my own well being.
I’ve felt extra emotional and slightly in a strange place mentally this past month and happy to say as of yesterday the heavy fog has been miraculously lifted. Perhaps it had something to do with Mercury being in retrograde but I don’t like to put all of my eggs in one basket nor place blame on anything outside of my own doing. Taking responsibility for my actions, emotions and feelings I accept that it’s a culmination of what I’ve been feeding my mind, body and spirit and to be honest each has been a little hungry for some extra loving care.
In the winter I almost always notice an increase of 2-5 lbs extra weight and I also notice a decline in my activity levels. I gain the extra pounds mostly due to my food choices not being as pure as they are in the Spring, Summer and Fall. For instance, I opt for more cooked foods in the Winter such as curries, soba noodles, whole grains, breads, pot pies and as healthy as these meals are they are in fact much heavier than my raw creations that keep me satisfied in the warmer weathers. Sure I could make raw vegan dinners but I choose not to as the comfort of warmer and heavier meals appeal to me, plus, I trust and intuitively know that my body will naturally crave these foods again come warmer days.
However, these “comfort” food choices with a decline in my exercise routine add up over time just like the pounds and I store them until they become so apparent that I can’t deny their presence anymore. The toxins begin to invade my whole well being mentally, physically, spiritually and emotionally. I become sad, as I feel I lose apart of myself in the process of accumulation. Sending my mind on a roller coaster of up and down emotions regarding who am I, what am I doing, I’m not good enough one day and then back up to feeling fabulous another. I also find that when my mind fights really hard to take over with annoying and destructive thoughts that my meditation practice becomes harder to do, leaving me deeper in the depths of feeling despair. Am I the only who feels this way or does this train-wreck string of thought sound familiar to you too? If so read on, because I promise you there is a rainbow in the near horizon, just as there usually is after the rains come pouring down.
When life is going easy, accomplishments are apparent, success are flowing and communication is vibing all seems dandy in my world. I realize after this storm that my practice now, is for all to be dandy in my world even when “mercury is in retrograde”. 😉
I realize that in order to not repeat the same destructive thought pattern I will really have to pay closer attention to my mind and make sure my thoughts are as clean as my food choices and when they are not clean I must flush them out just as I do with the toxins in my body. One way I practice flushing them out is by taking the power back into my own hands saying to myself “this is not my thought” as I choose to think differently. This usually helps me conjure up my own positive perspective on a situation as opposed to just accepting the one my mind has automatically fed to me.You see, instead of my mind feeding me, I am choosing to feed it. I tried this practice last night and it really helped me when I caught myself feeling sad about a judgement that I passed on someone that I love…. I said to myself first of all “who am I to pass this judgement?” I then said, “wait a minute this is not even my judgement”, “I have a choice in what I believe and I choose to not believe this judgment about the one I love”. Instead “I choose to send love to this person instead of passing judgement” because, the truth is, I can’t do anything greater for the other and myself than to send love. This instantly made me feel in control of my life, actions, feeling and emotions and in this moment of empowerment I knew it was the answer to set myself free of the shackles I have been wearing lately. I knew this was the lesson the choppy wave was teaching me.
Now, I should tell you that this isn’t the first time I’ve had this realization but this was definitely one of those empowering moments when I got to apply what I believe to be true and actually feel the positive effects of my choices. Remember our feelings are based on our choices, we have the option to feel any way we please and in my case I chose to end the suffering by making the choice to be love.
Yesterday, I felt a lightness to my being, newness, much like the fresh buds of spring blossoms. I felt the winds of change bringing in new fresh air to soak in and breathe fully. I was explaining this feeling to a friend of mine and we both found it mysterious and miraculous how suddenly something in the air has a way to make us sometimes both feel all right in our worlds again. Did Mercury suddenly stop retrograding?Lol! The only way I can make any sense of this feeling and the past month of turbulence is to compare it to surfing a wave, not fighting the pull that the large body of water can have on me but to go with the flow and trust that the water will let me off with having had one sweet ride if I can only just accept what is happening, breathe into the feelings of discomfort and keep going with the flow. Not an easy thing to do but certainly necessary in challenging times.
It’s not always easy to keep positivity flowing during uncomfortable situations but I find it is best not to fight and resist the feeling; but better that I ride it out and let it pass while trying to restore balance and find peace within through things that I enjoy such as friends, gardening, music, creating, yoga, running, meditation, etc…
Sending love out there to anyone else whose possibly feeling as I did. I can say that I now see the hard times were a growing lesson and hopefully one that I will reflect on and practice the next time hard times come around to teach me a helpful life lesson.
***Pay attention to not eat emotionally during these times as I caught myself many times wanting to eat more frequent as the unpleasant thoughts took up real-estate in my mind. Take the power back and make the right choices as they will lead you back to feeling better as soon as the wave breaks on the soft sandy shore setting your free”***
Speaking of rainbows at the end of the storm, I’ll be juice cleansing this weekend, join me in “Spring Cleansing”. I’ll be having a mix of my favorite homemade juices focusing on a variety of colors and nutrients!